Saturday, December 8, 2007

Your score at the half: Life 6 Tebow 35

No big surprise, as Tim Tebow won the Heisman Trophy Saturday night. The awards show was done at someplace called the Nokia Theater or Nokia Center or something. All I know is, the logistics of the place were awful. One of my favorite things to do every year is to check out the Heisman candidates' girlfriends in the row behind them and then guess which ones will get dropped by draft day.

(Think about it. Remember that hottie sitting behind Leinart? Never heard from her again. All we got there was the basketball girl with the baby - and it wasn't even the same girl! You'd think that if you were going to have an offspring with a girl, she might be the one to take a trip to NYC with. No wonder that one didn't work out.)

So this year, no cleat-chaser camera shots. VERY disappointing.

But what did we learn? Or better yet, what did I learn watching the awards ceremony...

1) Tim Tebow rides a scooter. I guess when you are handily winning at life you can get away with this. But only if you are ahead 3 scores.

2) Colt Brennan wears jean shorts. Yes, he was wearing them when they were filming him on the beach. This could have kept him out of the top 2. Jean shorts are a definite negative.

3) ESPN chose NOT to show McFadden's pimped-out ride. If we are going to have this dude play second fiddle two years in a row, let's at least let everybody know that he's ridin' BIG.

4) Chase Daniel got a free trip to New York. Enjoy it while you can, bud. Then it's back to the farm in Southlake. And see if Eric Crouch can handle a plow - maybe put him to use.

5) Unfortunately, no mention of the hallowed Tim Tebow Girlfriend. This is another reason why ESPN needs an alternate audio channel with just guys sitting around and talking about what's really on the mind of the viewer. Really, I've had enough with talk about the Cover 2 or a linebacker 'spying' a QB - I want the real story. Where is and who is this chick? And how can I pay her money to give me some attention?

6) Did June Jones make the trip? Can't say I saw him. Thought that was odd.

7) Houston Nutt sure looked good in that Arkassissippi-red tie. Way to play it down the middle, Houston. There had been talk about whether or not it was appropriate for him to be there, but that's ridiculous. Of course it was fine for him to be there. It also gets him on TV and associated with a Heisman candidate. Not necessarily terrible for recruiting.

8) In what might have been the worst speech ever, Tebow boasts 5 times that he "loves being a Gator". Let's be sure to enroll him in a speech class next semester.

9) Darren McFadden can finally make his great escape. The best player in college football can finally go to the NFL.